2012 - Inner Firewalking

How to Have a Very Difficult Conversation

The following is an excerpt of one of David’s coaching sessions in Top Coaching Techniques.

David: So I’ve got the sense that there are some things you haven’t been telling the absolute truth about, and you want to feel better about these things and be honest without huge upset.

Client: Right. This is with a few of my relationships with my family, I guess, for different reasons.

David: Okay. So, the first point I would make is that sometimes huge upset might be appropriate.

Client: Yeah, I realize that there could be some risks. I have wanted to talk openly with them, but that’s the fear – that there would be this big upset, and of course, I’m worried about losing love.

David: Yes, I totally get it. So one of the definitions of being powerful is to be straight in your communication and to take what you get. I totally understand that that’s asking a lot of you. You really have to stand tall and even grow and be a bigger person to say, ‘You know what? I’m going to take it. Whatever the upset is, I’m going to let them be, and just take whatever it gets.’

Making A Plan

The following is an excerpt of one of David’s coaching sessions in Top Coaching Techniques.

David: I’m hearing too in there that there might be some things that are important to you that are not getting attention right now. So, you’re actually out of integrity and that’s why you’re feeling that. It’s good news that you’re so sensitive about it. Some people don’t even notice.

Client: Right.

David: Or they just go and distract themselves.

Client: Part of it too is, Seth and I keep coming up with plans and we keep changing these plans. He has been changing his mind, and I feel like I have to go back and figure out what a new strategy is. So some of it is just needing to sit down and come up with a plan together, because there are too many unknowns. Part of it is the being out of integrity thing. In our relationship, he cares very much about making the money and I care about having fun. So, I feel like I have to keep bringing money to the table, but at the same time I really don’t care, because I just want to have fun.

David: So, if you are following his agenda, whose fault is that?

Client: Yeah. That’s part of the problem.

David: There’s something else I could send you that’s really cool and I think you might like it. I don’t think you’ve seen my personal life goal sheet. I’ll send you that and it might give you some ideas.

Form a Teleclass

The following is a transcription taken from Explode Your Practice.

David: So you got a newsletter, quarterly if you don’t want to spend a lot of time. You then have a teleclass.

Hmm. OK.

David: I say do a teleclass because your internet is worldwide and for a teleclass it’s at least nationwide.

Got it. That’s a good point.

David: And it’s very easy, rather than doing a seminar and they got to come there. And you’ve got to hire the hall or whatever. Just do yourself an hour a month.

That’s a good point. OK good.

David: And if there are not enough people, maybe do it every 3 months. It keeps you in the loop, it keeps you focused, and it keeps you creative.

50 Sessions Under Your Belt

David: The whole point of this is simply that everyone has the ability to help someone else.

Great

David: Now what you need, you need 50 sessions under your belt.

Right

The following is a transcription taken from Explode Your Practice.

David: It’s that simple. And it doesn’t have to be with paying clients, what I say is get out there do the sessions, you can call them practice sessions but what I prefer to call them is exploratory sessions.

David: That way there is no pressure on you to be a guru because you’re exploring

David: Now if you went and did 50 practice, one off sessions and now of those people tuned into clients then you would still learn an awful lot about yourself and about coaching.

Ways to Get a Pay Raise

The following is an excerpt of one of David’s coaching sessions in Top Coaching Techniques.

I will make a suggestion. I think there are two or three ways that would be quite common to go for a pay raise. One might be to work out what you’re worth. You might say that you’re already worth more than you’re being paid, and you might want to simply ask your boss to have a cup of coffee, or to have a chat, or go for a beer after work or something, and ask their opinion. You could say, ‘Do you think I’m worth more?’ ‘Is there more in the budget?’ ‘Could I have a pay raise right now, or within a certain time frame?’

Growing Confidence

The following is an excerpt of one of David’s coaching sessions in Top Coaching Techniques.

David: Hey, not everyone wants to be around me all the time. In fact, most don’t. They just want to be around me sometimes.

Client: Yeah.

David: So there’s this whole thing about the concept of loving yourself, and I think most of us don’t. I think I’m even still getting there. There are things about us that we just think are wrong. Now, the fact is, it’s not true. Anything about myself that I think I can criticize… Are you a religious person?

Client: Oh yeah, kind of.

David: OK, so let’s use the concept of God. You know God loves all of us. Why shouldn’t we? Who are we, if God says, ‘Look, you’re you and you’re magnificent’, then who are we to say, ‘No, I’m not’?

Client: Yeah, true.

David: That’s really, actually, quite obnoxious. It’s arrogant to say, ‘You know, my lack of confidence is a real problem, God. I shouldn’t have that. That sucks and I’m going to try and fix it every day.’ You know what I mean?

Client: Yes. Okay. That sounds good.

David: So at some point you’ll have this. You’ll have it from time to time, and then you’ll forget it and just go ‘Ah, I’m not going to give that any energy anymore, because it’s okay. I can be unconfident’. At some point it’ll be appropriate for you to have more confidence.

Archive

Yearly Archive for 2012

How to Have a Very Difficult Conversation

Making A Plan

50 Sessions Under Your Belt

Ways to Get a Pay Raise

Growing Confidence